With apologies to PETA, thanks to Tyson

High on the Hog

By: Robert Garner

Posted: 12/5/08

With the pressure of finals and other end-of-semester business looming large over our shoulders, let's visit somewhere where you can relax, put it all behind you and gawk at some TVs nicer than yours.

Our destination this week? Foghorn's.

Not only is it close to campus, but it is also just a fun place to go enjoy some Buffalo wings and cold drinks (sweet tea, thank you).

The walls are covered in so many TVs that I thought I had subconsciously drifted back yet again to Best Buy to stare at so many 42-inch, HD dreams yet to come true. A few basketball games were on, which warmed my soul. If you ever find yourself needing a place to watch the Razorbacks play, they say that the games are always on at Foghorn's.

While the sports bar atmosphere is great for relaxing and talking with friends, the most impressive aspect of the restaurant rests on an entire page of the menu. By my best count, Buffalo Wild Wings offers 14 sauces. I used to think that made for a difficult decision. Try 50 sauce flavors from Foghorn's. Yes, 50.

In order to take full advantage of the overabundance of sauces ole Foghorn has to offer, I recommend going on a Tuesday night when they offer all-you-can-eat wings for $12.99. My problem with their system: they serve them 10 at a time and they must be the same flavor. That drastically dashed my hopes of trying at least 10 different sauces. To beat the system, simply order different flavors than your wingman and maximize your wingspan.

Word play aside, using that tactic took my dinner party up to seven sauces (with two of us on the all-you-can-eat plan).

Based on those seven, my favorite would have to be the Hot Honey Barbecue (#15).

The Acid Rain (#4), their most popular sauce, was also really good. Another preferred flavor was Gold (#43). Gold features "all the sweet tanginess of mustard seeds and smoky BBQ sauce," in case you were wondering.

The Bourbon Glaze (#41) was also delicious, and it had a unique, bold Bourbon flavor.

Kung Fu (#32) had the misfortune of being the last flavor we got, so my stomach didn't allow me to fully appreciate its deliciousness, of which it had plenty. The Habanero Honey (#40) was quite tasty, although it doesn't deserve the two-pepper spiciness rating they have listed on the menu.

Acid Rain aside, a lack of spicy heat was a general trend throughout the meal, although the flavors were always good.

One thing I do not recommend: the Spicy Peanut Butter (#34). It sounds like a no-brainer to you, but "spicy," "chicken wings" and "peanut butter" should probably never be mixed again. Valiant effort, though, Foghorn's.

After 25 wings, 7 flavors, a bowl of fries and a few big glasses of sweet tea, I could not possibly stomach any more food. But for you, dear reader, we pressed forward to even greater extremes and topped off a few dozen tiny chicken legs with, you guessed it, dessert.

Dessert took us out of our TV wonderland and put us right in the middle of the county fair. Since they were out of cake, I opted for the fried brownie bites while my friend Jacob got the deep-fried Twinkie. Just for a good Arkansas measure, the deep-fried Twinkie was on a stick. To my delight, it was also drizzled in chocolate sauce. It was delicious and helped my waistline proceed another inch or so in that one meal.

The fried brownie bites were also simply delicious. My first bite, though, took me through the nice, crispy outer shell to lead me to a pool of molten brownie batter. After a few minutes of cooling, they were awesome because they had every phase of brownie crispiness you can imagine, all in one compact ball.

Sitting behind a mountain of more than 50 chicken wings, a few empty bowls from this or that, and several sauce-covered baskets, we sat victorious on our thrones of gluttony.

So, if you choose to spend the eve of Dead Day at Foghorn's, then get the all-you-can-eat wings, have a couple of drinks and catch some sports before the carnage of finals begins. If wings are not your thing, Foghorn's also has quesadillas, burgers, salads, sandwiches and much more. You might also want to go ahead and dig out that pair of pants you save for when you've gained a little weight, and pre-loosen your belt a couple of notches.

I need to add suggestions to my arsenal for next semester, so do send me your recommendations at rtgarner@uark.edu.

Good luck on finals, Happy Holidays and happy eating!

Robert Garner is a staff columnist for The Arkansas Traveler. This is his final column for the semester.